We are all impacted by our experiences, but trauma can have devastating impacts on your emotion regulation and behaviors. Trauma changes the wiring of your brain in order to help you avoid threats in the future. Unfortunately, it can also skew your perspective and see threats where one does not actually exist.
One issue that can arise in the aftermath of trauma is a difficulty regulating your anger. When something terrible happens to you, it’s understandable to be angry. However, you may find yourself struggling with anger months or years later, in situations that feel unconnected to your trauma. In today’s blog, let’s discuss the relationship between trauma and anger.
Anger as a Defense Mechanism After Trauma
After a traumatic event, anger can actually help you cope with what happened to you. It can energize and motivate you, keeping you from sinking into depression and hopelessness. In the first days after trauma, anger may help you to feel more protected or strengthened to get through the dangers and challenges facing you.
The problem is, that anger doesn’t necessarily go away when you no longer need it. It can bleed into other areas of your life, causing you to lash out when you are reminded of your trauma. Sometimes, you may even find yourself having angry or violent outbursts around people you love. This is where anger associated with PTSD can become a problem.
Anger as a Secondary Emotion
Anger has been found over the course of many studies to be a secondary emotion. This means that it is caused and fueled by some underlying emotion. Often, anger covers hurt or fear. These emotions leave you feeling vulnerable or exposed. Anger may be easier to express than hurt or fear, and it may make you feel stronger. Anger is also a more reactive emotion, which makes it easier to fall back on. When you’re feeling angry, it’s important to try to take a moment to consider where that anger is coming from, and what underlying emotion might be causing it.
Becoming “Stuck” In Anger
How To Regulate Anger Responses
Anger is a part of life. You’re never going to reach a point at which you never feel angry again, nor should that be something to strive for. There is nothing wrong with allowing yourself to feel your anger. However, you likely don’t want that anger to control you. If your anger is having a negative impact on your relationships, your work, or your view of yourself, it’s time to learn to regulate your anger responses. Here are a few ways that you can do this:
Talk To a Trauma Therapist
Many people struggling with anger issues may jump to the idea of taking an anger management class. This can be helpful, and we’ll delve into that later. But anger management classes can only do so much if you don’t treat the underlying trauma.
Part of the problem holding patients back from going to trauma therapy is the misconception that they aren’t “truly” traumatized. Trauma victims may diminish their trauma by saying “it wasn’t that bad” or “other people had it worse.” Meanwhile, those maladaptive coping mechanisms like angry outbursts continue and can even fester.
No matter what trauma you went through, it affected you. A trauma therapist will help you process your trauma and accept the way it changed you. They will guide you to develop new coping skills that serve you in the here and now rather than being stuck in the same old patterns.
Take an Anger Management Class
After addressing the trauma, talk to your therapist about whether or not an anger management class might benefit you. Anger management classes are exactly what it says in the name: they help you to manage your anger. You will learn new skills and ways of communicating your emotions without acting on anger. You may be given practical instances to practice over the course of the class so that you can be prepared for different situations.
Practice Mindfulness
The problem with trauma-induced anger is not the feeling itself, but rather the behaviors that can come from that anger. If you want to stop yourself from having outbursts, it may help to practice mindfulness. Angry outbursts are reactive. They’re a knee jerk reaction to the perception of being attacked. Mindfulness is the practice of observing the current moment and your feelings without judgment. It forces you to slow down and really focus on what’s happening in this moment. The more you practice mindfulness — whether meditation, journaling, or other mindfulness habits — the less reactive you will be.
Rivia Mind is here to help if you feel overwhelmed by your anger. Many of our skilled and compassionate clinicians are experienced in dealing with trauma and the anger that often comes with it. Contact us today to learn more or to schedule a free 15-minute consultation.
Resources:
- Anger & PTSD – National Center of PTSD
